Midnight Rambling.

Here it is, after midnight and I'm wide awake. I've been off work for a week for Christmas and throughout that week, I decided to stay up every night until two in the morning and then sleep until noon. But alas, I go back to work tomorrow. My alarm is set for 6:30 and here I am - unable to sleep - so I decided to blog. :)

I can't believe 2008 is coming to a close next week. The year has really flown by and when I step back and take a look at it, I get a little depressed. I mean, I realize that I have been extremely blessed this year. I love my family, my job and my new place, but being the critic that I am, I always feel compelled to look back and wonder what I could have done better. I'm at a very strange place in my life. I feel like I'm in between my amazing college years and whatever is around the corner....like I'm just hanging here, in this awkward middle land. I don't know when or if I will ever feel the kind of connection I felt in college. I was surrounded by hundreds of Christian people my age, and I was working towards a goal in life. Now? I'm trying to be content. Most days I am happy. I just always feel like I'm missing something. I think it's the holidays. I don't know.

At any rate, my Christmas was precious. I'm trying to pause and really savor special moments, even the crazy ones like my mom and I handing candy canes out to random people at gas stations:) I know that life is over much too soon and I need to enjoy where I am - instead of always waiting for the next big thing.

Staff winter retreat is coming up this week and I'm sooooo excited about the tacky formal. I pretty much love my dress to death. I'll post some pics. Speaking of winter retreat, I have an insane amount to do this week. I've got to get some sleep. Seriously. What am I doing? Did this post make sense? Yeah. Probably not. I always tell everyone to ignore anything that I say after 11pm. Can't say I didn't warn you:D

Here it is...my grown-up blog! I still have a xanga account at www.xanga.com/abbylikesunshine but I decided it was time to start something here. I've been so blessed while reading the blogs of others and hope that maybe somewhere along the way, amidst all my randomness, I can make an impact on someone.

It is Christmas Eve. Can you believe it??! This year has just flown by. For some reason, Christmas feels different this year. This is the first year that the entire family has not been together. My sister got married in May and is spending Christmas with her in-laws and New Year's with us. It seems weird. I also have a family member who is suffering right now. Not just physically, but mentally and emotionally, and that is hard to understand. She will from now on associate that suffering with this time of year, and I hate that for her.

But, regardless, this time of year is simply magical. The fact that the God of the universe sent His one and only Son to this Earth to be born as a human is such a miracle. I will never get over the fact that He chooses to love us, in spite of our failures and mistakes. He chooses to use us, just as He used a young girl and a group of shepherds all those years ago. It's beautiful.

Merry CHRISTmas! May you take the time this year to see the love of Christ in the faces of those around you.