I have been trying to work through what I learned while I was in Guatemala...and while it is not ground-breaking revelation, it is what I needed to hear. Here it is:
My priorities are out of order.
Leaving the country, I thought I would meet a group of people who were completely different than me. I thought we would have nothing in common; and while there were major differences (language, culture, etc), the thing I realized was not the differences between us but the similarities. I realized that we all long for the same things - no matter where we live. We want to be loved; we want to find value and worth in our work; we want to support our families. Of course I knew this, but I don't think I realized it until I saw it first-hand. Here I was, miles from my home, in a foreign country and the people were - at their cores - the same as I am. I felt extremely connected to them, and that surprised me. I didn't expect that.
When I came back to America I tried to figure out what it was God wanted me to learn through this experience. Of course I could give away all of my clothes and sell my truck and send the money to the poor...but I don't think that is the extent of what He is teaching me. I think, instead, I need to evaluate my priorities. In Guatemala, because they did not have televisions and computers and six-figure salaries, the families and communities spent time together. They played silly games and ate together and worked alongside one another. They lived SIMPLY - with what they needed - and not much more.
I began looking at my life. Where do I spend my time? Where do I spend my money? I strive to...succeed I guess? I want my house to be cute and my hair to be nice. I want to help as many people as I can so I am constantly overcommitted and busy. But what is the most important thing? Could I drop a few of these committees and spend time investing in the lives of individuals? Can I live without certain conveniences and give that money to someone who really needs it? What really matters?
This thought was compounded by the fact that a friend of mine from ETBU, Heather Hopson-Graff, passed away suddenly last Monday. She is married to a sweet guy and has a four month old daughter. She was fine last weekend; and Monday she had a brain aneurysm. They tried to operate but she didn't make it. By Monday evening she was totally gone. 26 years old. I couldn't believe it. I've been walking around in a daze for a week - just completely shocked and sad. Her young husband will have to live the rest of his life without her. Her baby girl will never be able to know how amazing she is. They won't be able to shop together. She won't be there to help her get ready for her first day of school or on her wedding day. I just started thinking - what if that was me? What will I leave behind when I'm gone? Will it matter that I was in twelve organizations or that my house was decorated nicely?
I get frustrated on a regular basis because I have no money or because I'm too busy or because I'm single and don't want to be. It helps to step back and look at the big picture. Am I going to sit around being sad because I'm single or am I going to use this time to invest? Am I going to be involved in one hundred things and do them halfway or be involved in a few things where I can really make an eternal difference?
The only thing that really matters is what we do for God - the legacy we leave behind. The people in Guatemala spend quality time on the things that really matter. Heather left behind a legacy of love; of passion; of joy for life. What about me? What about you? Maybe we should all step back and learn to focus on the things that will last forever - instead of what is temporary.
