The First Date.

This weekend I was watching “Why am I Still Single” on vh1. I know it’s embarrassing and I don’t know why I started watching it. I had a stomach bug and after two days inside you start watching whatever is on. Good news though: I will probably never watch it again. It’s so AWKWARD! They take these people with major issues, give them makeovers and send them on the most awkward first dates of all time. It’s painful to watch.

This reminded me of how much I hate the beginnings of relationships. I just strongly dislike the weird strained conversations and the way you are not sure if you like them or they like you. I annoy myself. I stress about my stupid hair and whether or not I’m going to trip or have something stuck in my teeth. “Um..so where are you from?” I accidentally interrupt while he is mid-sentence. I don’t know what to say! I talk WAY too much, and I probably mess with my hair the whole time. 

One of my very wise friends (shout out to you Kristie Martinez!) reminded me that every first date I go on could be my LAST first date ever. That really put things in perspective for me. I want so badly to be years down the road. I want him to know how I feel and finish my sentences. But this could be the only time that I’m feeling nervous butterflies for the first time. This could be the last time I hear his funny stories for the first time or hear him talk about how his best friend’s dad passed away and it made him cry. From here on out I will know his favorite color and middle name and life goals. I will never notice again for the very first time how good he is at winking, or how his eyes get big when he talks about something he likes. I should treasure these moments. Even if it doesn’t usually work out...it could. 

It could turn out to be this guy:

Or this guy:

 This could be my very last very first date.

And that’s worth a whole lot of awkwardness.

Ignore the Mess!

I'm trying out some new blog background/header/designs...and getting FRUSTRATED! :) One day I'll be an expert...but for now I'm going to eat.

My Break-up with Bread

I have been on somewhat of a low-carb diet for 5 months. I know what you are thinking: WHO IS THIS? WHY DID SOMEONE HACK INTO ABBY’S BLOG AND WRITE THIS STATEMENT? Alas it is true. I have not been drinking regular sodas or eating bread/sugar since June. I got to a point where I was just very unhappy with myself. I used to stay at an okay size without trying too hard but after college things went downhill fast. It turns out I’m not allowed to eat whatever I want and still fit in my pants anymore. Welcome to adulthood right? Yuck. My friend tried this diet and it seemed to work out well for him so I thought I would give it a try.

The only reason that I think I have been able to stick to this plan is because it does give you a day off now and then. If I don’t see any light at the end of the tunnel I will just give up, but this diet has “feast days” thrown in (aka: my favorite days ever). I have lost about 16 pounds thus far, which probably seems like nothing but it’s a lot to me because it’s really really difficult for me to lose weight. I’m excited about it. As I was eating a tuna packet the other day (pretty much my staple at this point), I started thinking about what I’ve learned during these weeks. And here it is....Lessons from a Low Carb diet written by a carb lover (me):

1. Breakfast is a delicious and important meal. I used to skip breakfast all the time. Now I eat it every morning and it has been delightful. It really feels good to get up and eat something and it helps me not to feel like I’m starving to death by eleven.
2. Diet soda isn’t that bad. I know I know. I am the world’s biggest fan of Dr. Pepper and I don’t think I will ever be one of those people who say, “regular sodas are just too sweet!” I love Dr. Pepper with a deep passion and I do drink one now and then but as I drink diet soda I am learning that it’s really not as bad as I thought. It’s better than nothing – that’s for sure. And I only have one a day.
3. I’ve got major love for Splenda. I used to hate it. I still don’t love it like I love regular sugar but honestly, you get used to it. I was a skeptic, but you just have to stick with it. It gets better.
4. Mexican food is awesome for a low carb diet. Hello fajitas. I love you. Mexican restaurants are probably the most conducive to this diet. I’m allowed to have beans and meat so there are lots of options. And hallelujah, there is no shortage of Mexican restaurants in South Texas.
5. I eat a lot of things I didn’t think I liked. For instance, beans. I don’t love beans, but I can eat them so I do. I mix salsa with black beans or put jalapenos & onions in pintos. I eat canned salmon with mustard and honestly, I love it. I also recently discovered hummus...and I eat it like it’s going out of style. I can have as much vegetables and meat as I want so there is a lot of chicken and broccoli involved. I think it helps to be creative. Use lots of spices.
6. I chew sugar free gum A LOT. It makes me feel like I’m eating dessert. I know, that’s lame. But it’s lame to have to buy pants in the next size up also isn’t it? Yes. I go through quite a few packs of extra watermelon gum at this point in my life. Like, three packs every two weeks.
7. When I have to eat something sweet I eat Atkins bars. They are pricey...but let me tell you what, they are worth it. They taste like real candy...kind of. If you hold your nose and close your eyes you can convince yourself you are eating a snickers. Beggars can’t be choosers.
8. If you don’t have carbs at your house you won’t eat them! I know this is easier for me than others because I live alone, but I just don’t buy ANYTHING that I can’t eat. If I have a bag of Doritos in the pantry I’m going to eat that bag of Doritos. That’s just how it is. It helps me a lot to remove temptations. The other day I was baking cupcakes for a friend and I had to immediately wash the dishes so I didn’t lick the batter bowl. I was eating an Atkins bar while I was baking as well. I told myself it was a cupcake.
9. Once you see the number on your scale change (even just a little) or you find it a tiny bit easier to zip up your pants all of the work is completely worth it! I can’t even tell you. I have never really lost any weight before, but the fact that my pants fit better makes me think that I could do this forever. It’s just an awesome feeling to see the work pay off. You should have seen me dance around after I zipped up my jeans the other day. It was embarrassing.
   

I have had no time for physical activity lately but I’ve been stepping that up over the past couple of weeks. I do feel better after I run/work out so I’m trying to make that a priority. I know all of the exercise enthusiasts reading this are thinking: “why don’t you just get up early in the morning and run? That’s what I do and it’s awesome!” I’m sorry. But I have a disorder. I hate mornings. I run in the evenings...or I don’t run. Baby steps. I download audiobooks that I want to read to my ipod and then don’t allow myself to listen to them unless I’m on the treadmill. I have to bribe myself. I do want to lose about 15 more pounds, so I’m going to stick with this plan and hope it continues to pay off.

I just want to let you know that if I can do this – ANYONE CAN. I’m not being sarcastic. I love bread. I love it so much. But I’ve set my mind to do it and I feel really proud of myself. Besides, I’ve decided if I turn 30 and I’m not married I’m going to start working on being the “crazy aunt”. I’m going to dye my hair bleach blonde, buy a red convertible and wear leopard leggings all the time, so I’m going to have to make sure my figure is ready for that. Hahahaha...